Friday, April 27, 2007

Drifting Updated


This is really a cool game I was playing on the computer after all the nights of “working”, called Online World Drifting Championships. I hold the Global Rank of 6,802? After having scored total points of 129,050 (which include the amount of drifts and the time taken to finish the course). Which I was a bit disappointed. (Cuz I have a bit of real drifting skills)! Anyway I did my best.

After hours of playing, I think this is the best I could do. Total Points=174,693GLOBAL RANK:2,981
Click here to try this Game NOW!!

Saturday, April 21, 2007

You cheer me up.

I received an email from my future Brother-in-law and it was really ,really…an encouragement letter to me.(After what had happen and already expressed myself in my last writings )
Anyway I think he reads my blog? The problem is that he don’t even talk to me directly when we see each other.( Not to mention even through phone!(SHARKS) And I was really Dam surprise to received his e-mail.
Just to let you know 'he' (my bro-in-law) gave me the green light to post this picture in my Web blog. I feel he is just giving me the support I need during this hard time where I have to rough it through, and most of all I know I am not alone in this world anymore. It feels like I am in a war fighting a losing battle and reinforcements has arrive just to save a Private. Drugs had made a great impact in my life, esp in the relationship part.(I am getting rid of my Opiate dependency and my choice is?..... to get myself through this 'the hard way', so as I will never go near a pharmacy again!!!)......OR was this my imagination? (I am just kidding).
  • BY THE WAY:He don't do drugs and have a University degree .

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

It looks like WE C.A.R.E Foundation doesn’t want me.

I was spending time in a place called the We Foundation in Singapore to seek treatment form my Pharmaceutical addiction. I like the place so much and treated it as my second home after a Program I attended in 2005. I donated what I could to the organization (Keyboard stand, A mike stand, guitar stand(lost in space?), Sustain pedal ….)This cost me hundreds of dollars, as an appreciation to what the place taught me .A guy I shall not name was also there and was giving us talks during the weekend for that course I attended. I chose him as a sponsor (to simplify things a sponsor means he will be of help to me when I crave for my drug. and help me from my addictive behaviors)
I found out later that he was very crafty. He did not make any effort to answer, one phone call I made, when I was in a crises to use drugs.
What made things worst was I still carried on the sponsorship with him and not make the change of my sponsorship! I have this ‘people pleasing’ personality (that was told by my friend)I really do not know if this habit is good or bad.
It is 2007 now, and I am still having a hard time with my addictive behaviors. So one day when I was at the WE. C.A.R.E Foundation, I was telling him I will put a Web Cam on the computer system which I hook up (I have a few old cams at home and the old pc at the café crashed), so as people can use the computer in the ‘3Cs” café to unwind them self, I hook up a new system :)
He shouted at me saying “hay we run this place not you, ok .Don’t try to act smart!” I told him I set up the computer system but he shouted back at me saying he is the one who set it up!? True enough, he always wants to take the credit and that is only one of his Personality. Anyway he went into the office and when one of the higher ranking staff of the foundation saw me he was like “hay ! hay ! what, what)I really did not know what he told him. All I could say I feel he was being crafty and he said a different story. I was so piss off and felt that no one appreciated my work and my good intentions. I was so demoralized and I told them that my parents wanted to donate some money to that place. (Which was not true.) I than started to cover up my lie by saying I took my dad’s $ 2000 check and spent it. (which was not true either )
Anyway to cut things short I was “ban” form that place for the time being because I am back on pharmaceuticals .I was also at fault because I am getting glanderous thoughts (siao) due to my depression and hight benzodiapine abuse.

P/S I have a strong feeling he will get back at me some way or another.(I always have the impression of him as being mean and needs the habit to what na take charge of things. He even says that he will sue me if I did not take off a photo from one of my web blog .(I just hope I is just my imagination)

Sunday, April 08, 2007


I really miss you guys . Anyway I am in a bad shape now so don't contact me.You guys take care ya....
And Shan even though we had broken up , You will aways be my friend. (Hugs )